Edit – I will be online – the world is not my slut. Thanks Jecklin.
The shit has hit the fan and is flying out of control. This weekend was the last straw. I cannot live in this atmosphere. I cannot work with all the noise. I cannot listen to the drug talk. I cannot! I am fast becoming the person I do not want to be. I can’t live this way. I am making some very difficult decisions over the next couple of days and I am feeling scared because the good things in my life have had to take a back seat while I am coping with reality offline and seeing things for what they really are in my life. I can’t stand the TV on. I can’t stand the stomping and doors slamming. I am a prisoner in my own home.
Please say a prayer for me.
These are the good things. The following are clear and honest in my mind.
I will continue Blogging.
I will continue freelancing as a designer.
I will paint and draw.
I will complete all the work I have said I would do.
I plan to continue gardening.
I plan to keep my apartment in Vancouver.
And I plan to make enough money to do it by myself.
I am so tired of this you guys. I am so tired of the drama that is in my life.
It is not often that I will ask for help. Please send good strong thoughts my way. I need courage right now more than ever to speak firmly, honestly and remain calm while doing so. I will not continue to jeopardize my mental health and secondly my financial well being any longer.