The Implosion – I’m really a geek at heart

I don’t know the exact date that I drew this on but it was sometime during mid to late 2009 while sitting on the couch in the living room and likely it was late at night as it is right now when all is quiet with the moon shining and snow melting and everyone is asleep and there is no phone ringing and no cars whizzing by and all I hear is but Missy Two Shoes the cat snoring in her basket.

I love the night more than any other time. I naturally gravitate towards it regardless of what timezone I live in. My brain seems to turn on at 3AM when I’m able to process copious amounts of information and the ideas just seem to flow onto paper more freely.

I find myself drawing daily lately and it’s both a blessing and curse at the same time. The more I draw, the less money I make as I’m not online as much. And this has got me thinking about what to do about that.

I find money to be a conundrum at best. I’m almost finished my 2009 bookkeeping and it’s refreshing to see growth but it’s disheartening to know how much harder it is to stay on top of things, namely the technology as it is ever changing. When you are an online content creator such as a blogger (hey, that’s me and perhaps you) you have a double edged sword against you when compared to the person who simply uses the technology to say be entertained, shop or to keep in touch with friends and family. I need to stay on top of new technology or I will fall behind. And truth be told I read more geeky tech stuff and do more searches and watch live broadcasts and blogs pertaining to SEO, social media, google wave and now buzz and ipad stuff than the average person. I find it enlightening and entertaining at times, even when I don’t understand how to code or program or why the big guys can’t agree on cross platform compatibility. Seriously!

I simply don’t read girly magazines, decor blogs or anything clothing and style related. I find they skew my perception of reality to much and more importantly mess up my brain into thinking my artwork needs to be a certain way… the Etsy way? I do read novels and more and more they are science fiction in nature or an adventure with a female heroine being the main character.

So what do I read while drinking Pepsi? I read BoingBoing for the perverse and newsworthy, ReadWriteWeb for the opinion, solutions and ideas, theUrbanSherpa for short stories and Penelope Trunk, whom I just discovered today! Wow! I pop into Wired on occassion and read the Thesis blog and Forums. I subscribe to both GapingVoid‘s and Communicatrix‘s email newsletters as I find them both intelligent and fascinating people.

Growing up I was more of a Tomboy who enjoyed camping and fishing just as much as I my brother did.

OH and I drew this imploding abstract with a Pilot G-tec C4 pen inside a 5 1/4 by 5 1/4 inch Hand•Book cream coloured paper sketchbook. And maybe one of these days, CSS, php and javascript will make since to me but until then I’ll continue to learn and use technology to the best of my ability or in the least let it inspire me creatively.

Much of my most recent works which are not posted online (yet) are explorations into how I see the online world… it’s ever changing and blossoming landscapes, it’s groupings and re-groupings, it’s deaths and mass migrations, assimilations, the births, the friendships, the metaphysical and above all the humanity engrained within cause me to ponder why and how it’s all happening in real-time. It’s beautiful don’t you think?

I began this post at 3AM in the morning and finished it this evening at 10PM.

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7 thoughts on “The Implosion – I’m really a geek at heart

  1. I can definitely relate to your reading material! Right now, I have the newest copies of “Customer Relationship Management” and “E-Week” to read… a slew of magazines sitting on my desk, written for larger companies with departments and big budgets. I devour every word anyway, hoping for that one grain of advice or idea that I can apply to my own one-gal show. LOL

    You’ve hit the nail on the head! The catch-22 for artists trying to make a living for themselves, on their own… the time spent creating new art is time NOT being spent marketing and throwing themselves in front of people. Unless you start creating youtube videos of your doodling-in-progress. :)

    As popular as Milton and Sassy are… your fans will always be anticipating the next great piece of Jessica!

  2. Thank you for this post – I enjoy hearing your perspective on things.

    I’ve noticed that trying to learn technology tends to wear me out. I don’t have much time to read and I have to admit that when I do read, it’s not about technical stuff. I get overwhelmed by all the things I don’t know and my perception that it will take soooo much energy to figure it all out. I also feel embarrassed and stupid because of my limited knowledge. I won’t be giving up anytime soon, though. The problem is, once I do get the hang of one thing, it’s already outdated and everyone else is onto the next wonderful thing! I’m sure this will only get more challenging the older I get.

    I can relate to working in the middle of the night. I love it too. It’s the only time where nothing else demands my attention. I have to be careful though. If I don’t get enough sleep, I’m not very nice to my family and that’s not good. Guess I’ve got to find the balance!

  3. Jessica,

    I see you suffer the same “turn on” brain at 3 am. The hard time that I have is next day until 11 am I start functioning again!

    This piece that yo share I like it very much, expressive and exploding two actions, you can see it from onside out or from out side in… very interesting very few images can give both effects.
    Very nice work Jessica, thanks for sharing!!!

    Obed

  4. keep drawing, keep doing what you like to do, what comes from ‘inside’ of you….. rather than worrying about money and ‘being online’ for money… Your purpose in life is not to earn money but to connect with God using your creativity, money will come automatically, attracted to you…. xoxo
    V

  5. Beautiful as always!
    I am trying to get in the habit of staying up later. Weird I know, but I feel like I’m not giving enough time to my perfect my craft. I work a full time job 8-5p, so of course then the gym, once I get home I have to see after my Coco (doggie) and get situated. A couple of hrs later, I’m tired and sleepy. My goal is to pull in late hrs to get things going, so I can soon work at home, for myself. I can sacrifice sleep for my dreams.

    Did you find yourself going through anything similar, when you use to work for someone else?

  6. I found a sleep pattern that lets me reconciliate the productivity of working at nightime and the 8-4 job: sleep from 17hrs to midnight.

    The downside of it is that totally eliminates any perspective of social interactions (except at work) which is why I’m only on it a few days at a time. It also makes your time at work a bit more painfull since you expanded a fair amount of your energy during the night. I can live with that, my work isn’t that important to me and I do not care for a career; it’s only there until I can get my on thing rolling like you have.

    It’s hard being passionate about something. It always come at odds with the well regulated life mandated by society for creativity does not play well with structure.

    Thankfully, our online presence can make up for our physical absence (it has to be balanced though), if only it did’nt require as much upkeep…

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