Category Archives: music

A bird looking at fuzzy looking things

jessica_bird_fuzzylg

I have been drawing more lately using my favorite pen; the PILOT G-TEC-C4. Excellent for writing and/or drawing. The above spread was created over a few days this week. I tend to draw many things at once, going back over them again and again adding detail. I never use a pencil first, unless I am composing an image that will be painted in using watercolor. Just pen on paper. The journal I am currently working in contains about 60lb paper stock, is acid free, cold press and unbleached. I like cold-press paper because it gives a light texture to draw upon rather than the stark hot-press paper, which tends to be smoother and have a sheen to it.

I completed this drawing two nights ago down at my friend Soren’s home. He created music while I drew to it. He said:

It looks like a bird looking at fuzzy looking things…

Hence the title of the drawing. Below is a detail of Bird.

jessica_bird_fuzzydetail

Line Walking

Ever feel like you are walking on a line, similar to a path, but it’s a line, unending in time. On either side there lies choices; each opposite of the other; to be or not to be. To get off this damn line one has to make a choice. What if the ability to choose paralizes you emotionally, physically, mentally or spiritually. All it takes is a single hesitation for the onset of paralyses. To hesitate causes fear.

Continuing along the line stumbling here and there small choices get made and some larger ones. As you walk you see the past and future as memories and ideas respectively. Where is the present you ask yourself? The present is when a choice is made and you step off the line. Sometimes you will fall. Sometimes you will jump. Many times you will step back on the line because the line is safe.

In the brain, time does not exist. Time is only numbers, a way to record what happened and what will be. The present is reality and your reality is, whatever you choose it to be.

A week into being sober my boyfriend says to me singing “Break on through to the other side”. I was furious and grumpy already. However, his wit struck a chord; I knew the song but not what it meant, nor did I know all the lyrics so I looked them up. I also looked up what they could possibly mean. Here is a great explanation written by Andrew Johnson. Tonight, I walk the line.

You know the day destroys the night
Night divides the day
Tried to run
Tried to hide
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side, yeah

We chased our pleasures here
Dug our treasures there
But can you still recall
The time we cried
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side

Yeah!
C’mon, yeah

Everybody loves my baby
Everybody loves my baby
She get
She get
She get
She get high

I found an island in your arms
Country in your eyes
Arms that chain us
Eyes that lie
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side
Break on through, oww!
Oh, yeah!

Made the scene
Week to week
Day to day
Hour to hour
The gate is straight
Deep and wide
Break on through to the other side
Break on through to the other side
Break on through
Break on through
Break on through
Break on through
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

—Jim Morrison, The Doors, 1968

Reality is different now without drugs. Nothing is constant.